This has been the BIG question we are being asked by everyone so I though I would explain the process here. Here are the steps involved in the process.
§Our placement agency sends us hard copy of referral documents. (1 week)
§We return the signed acceptance document along with the applicable fees due.
§Our placement agency's staff in Ethiopia turns our dossier into MOWA (Ministry of Women's Affairs in Ethiopia).
§MOWA creates a dossier for the children, approves us, and generates a letter to the court system. (3 weeks-?)
§A court date is set. (4 weeks in the past though now has been much longer)
§Our placement agency's staff in Ethiopia makes sure all necessary documents are prepared prior to the court date.
§Court hears our case, approves, or if not, sets another court date which can be weeks or months later. Our power of attorney, the agency's facilitator is present for this.
§Court approves adoption.
§Our placement agency is notified of the status via their facilitator, who is our power of attorney.
§Our placement agency's staff in Ethiopia applies for the childrens' birth certificates and passports.
§Our placement agency's staff in Ethiopia schedules the VISA appointment at the US Ethiopian Embassy, once the BC and passport are generated. (4-6 weeks after court approval)
§Our placement agency notifies us of the appointment and we schedule our travel accordingly.
Our referral got approved by IAN's matchmaker today (well we know know who really does the matchmaking!). She made sure the referral met the criteria in our home study, signed off on it and then the referral acceptance letter was sent to us via email. Amazingly all that happened to day (why does God amaze me? He is so absolutely faithful!)when Samuel, who was on a business trip to Mexico, got home now. The papers have been signed, faxed to and received by our agency. It's official! Ethiopia will hear today that we WANT these boys to be OUR SONS!!!! God be praised for HIS goodness!!!
If you couldn't tell we are over the top excited! Our coordinator asked if it was ok for her to post the news on the agency blog and I think I busted her ear drum with a "You go girl!" Bronx, NY style!
I checked the blog out just a few minutes after our call with her and it was already posted! Here is the post:
Tuesday, March 3, 2009 (MORE) Waiting List Movement The number one family on the baby boy waiting list has accepted referrals for two wonderful boys. Everyone moves up one spot on the baby boy wait list!
Hannah-mama to 4 princesses and soon to be 2 princes! (not soon enough for me though!)
Of course I immediately sent the referral pictures we got of the boys to be printed out but I also immediately emailed a couple of the women who are traveling soon to Ethiopia. I gave them Eyob and Kenesa's names in hopes than if they see them at Sele Enat they can take pictures of them. Our coordinator told us a family who traveled a couple of weeks ago may have taken pictures of the boys. Though a long shot the agency is going through the pics to see if there are any. I hope there are!!!
Speaking of pictures you are probably asking yourself, "Why hasn't she posted any pictures of the boys?" You know I would love to BUT the Ethiopian government has asked that prospective adoptive parents not post pictures on the internet until the children are legally adopted and are in their custody. Even though this blog is private we really want to make sure we abide by the country's ruling. Sorry!
At EXACTLY 11:30 am (God has a wonderful sense of humor!) my cell phone rang. My daughter ran to get the phone and answered it.(Our coordinator actually thought she was me and began to tell her she had some information!)When my daughter gave me the phone, Sarah, told me they had received Kenesa’s medical but not his social background and would we be willing to see it?YEEEEEEEESSSSS!!I know I felt sure this baby was to be ours and I know I felt it would happen today BUT that did not take away from the wonderment of the moment.I felt as if I was on a cloud.As Sarah sent the email, I instant messaged Samuel to come down stairs and then gathered the girls to open it together.Refreshing my inbox a few times there it finally was, an email whose subject was “here you go” with a picture of a paper clip by it.How can something so wonderful come in such a unpresuming package?As I clicked on it I could feel my heart beating.Scrolling down we were all treated to the most precious face.His expression said, “I need you to come get me, hold me, and love me”.His sweet cheeks ready to be kissed and his arms ready to have a family to reach out for, we were all moved to a synchronized “AAAAAAH he’s SOOOOOOOOOOO cute!”.
As we gazed into his beautiful eyes my fingers began to make the rounds I had made only the day before, instant messaging my sister and mother.Of course they thought he was cute, who could not!For my SIL we devised a shcem that was a bit more involvedI quickly sent Kenesa’s photos to Costco and then my daughter reminded my SIL Yvonne that she needed to pick up Eyob’s photos at Costco.The plan worked perfectly and she called after checking the enveloped and knew she had been surprised!
We converted Kenesa’s stats and he is a peanut!
Weight 5.25 kg/11.46 pounds3-5th percentile
Length 61 cm/24 inches10-25th percentile
Head circum. 41cm-16.14 inches10-25th percentile
Weight for length<>rd percentile
As I spoke to Sarah later in the day I was told how Kenesa’s was indeed the only paperwork that had arrived overnight!I was not surprised but amazed and grateful by my Father’s handiwork!I asked what orphanage he was in and was once again blessed to hear he was at Sele Enat.Another answer to prayer.The boys are together!
The air charged with excitement, my heart is racing with a sweet anticipation which all can sense.After praying late last night my heart is persuaded, by faith, to expect God’s answer to prayer.
I wondered and calculated trying to figure out the time difference between Ethiopia and Colorado (when is our agency one mountain time when we live in NC!).Then my wondering turned to when our coordinator might be at the agency office, how long it took her to check her emails and then call us.I asked my husband to check the exact time she had called the previous day.11:30 exactly, our time.With that we went on with the business of the morning, though I am sure with hearts ready to burst.
I knew I would have questions for Sarah so I called her late this afternoon.I shared first how exciting all this was and she shared how hard it had been to keep quiet!We also spoke about Eyob’s stats and the age on his medical report.We both agreed he was probably older than the report stated but by how much we of course had no idea.After answering some questions I mentioned the baby boy she had spoken to Samuel about.She said that they were 99.9% sure he was not on of the HIV children that were supposed to be coming in and that is why she mentioned him to Samuel.She went on to say that his medicals could come at any time but that if he was not able to be referred to us we would then have to wait several weeks for another referral.After I got off the phone I shared the conversation with Samuel.Kenesa was already in his heart and he “knew” things would not work out.We prayed and waited to see what God would do.
I called Leah (a coordinator at the agency who I had become acquainted with before we singed on with the agency).She was very excited for us and asked which baby we had been referred.After talking about his possible age begin older she said that our coordinator had asked us if we would consider his referral as he might possible be an older baby.Leah was quick to tell her that we would indeed consider him an infant and that she needed to give us his referral!Oh, Lord how blessed we are that you work all these things out for our good!I feel so overwhelmingly blessed by the goodness of our Lord.
Later in the day as I gave praise to our heavenly Father for his goodness I began to look up Kenesa’s name.As I did I was struck with how he and Eyob’s names came together to make such an incredible statement.So many prayers had been answered up to that point and now I had one more.I asked the Father to make a way for Kenesa’s medical report to come in overnight so that Samuel could share in the joy of Kenesa’s referral before he had to go to Mexico.As I said the prayer I realized the presumption that Kenesa was meant to be matched to us but it felt right, ordained.I realized also that my prayer was for me as well.The thought of waiting any longer to hear about the situation seems impossible, though I know God’s grace would be more than sufficient if necessary.
On my way home from the doctors appointment as I worshiped I was led to pray and as I did I felt “Are you willing to get these areas of your life right?”I knew the Lord had called me to deal with areas of my life as we waited to meet our boys and more than coincidence in timing I believed these areas needed to be dealt with so that I could be the mother they needed me to be.As the words pierced my heart I was reminded of the video of the baby left in a latrine.Would I be one of the bystanders not willing to give of themselves or one of those who counted the cost and put aside their own life for the sake of another’s?As I began to cry I prayed for our boys and committed to yielding those areas God desired of me.
As I arrived at my sister’s a funny thought came to mind, really out of no where.With all these doctors appointments watch Sarah calls when I’m not home!Nah, she wouldn’t dare, LOL!
Samuel: Thursday February 26th, at 11:30 a.m., Sarah Strong, from International Adoption Net called me at my home office.Hannah was on her way back home from a doctor appointment.I knew it was Sarah calling because I was on another call and had to click over and tell ask her to wait a moment.Sensing that she might have good news for us, I quickly finished my other call and clicked back over to her.She told me, “I have a referral for you and Hannah!”She had my full attention.Sarah said she had pictures and medical/social history for little Eyob, a baby boy stated to be 7 months old, but who appears to us to be closer to 10-12 months.She said he was healthy, developing normally and very cute.I asked her if all the information she was giving me was in the email she was going to send me.She said yes and I asked her jokingly, “Why isn’t the email here yet?”She laughed and said she was typing our email address as fast as she could.Within minutes, I received her email with his pictures (2).My heart leapt when I saw little Eyob for the first time.I giggled because he had that little quirky, mischievous look I’ve seen in my first 4 children.Sarah said that there was another infant boy in the wings, but that his medical report had not yet returned and we would have to wait on that.Then she told me he appeared to her to be younger than Eyob and that his name was Kenesa.When I asked Sarah how soon they would know about Kenesa she said she did not know but that it should be anytime, though there was no way to know if he was healthy.With that I asked her not to tell my wife or daughters about the referral as I wanted to surprise them.
After hanging up, I immediately began looking up the meaning of their names.I suspected that Eyob was Job and a quick check online confirmed that it was Job which meant “persecuted.”The name “Kenesa” intrigued me and I felt driven to find out the meaning.A search turned up several results that said. “Kenesa is the term for a Karaite or Persiansynagogue. The word derives from the Aramaic word for "assembly" (in Hebrew, the word for synagogue is beit knesset).”Together, their names mean “persecuted assembly or congregation”!In my heart I knew the assembly was those whose were persecuted for standing on God’s word.I thought, “How can this be a coincidence?”This is what we have been sharing about, standing alone even though it may mean persecution from even those who call themselves Christians.The boy’s names were no coincidence.Even though Sarah said it was not 100% that Kenesa would be referred to us I knew in my heart that he would.Abba is able to coordinate the circumstances to bring His will to pass!
When Hannah called me a couple of minutes later, she was next door at her sister’s house.Too excited I could not concentrate on the information she was trying to give me about the doctor and wanting to give her the good news I headed next door.
Hannah:Once at my sister’s home I spent a few minutes visiting.After a bit I called Samuel to ask him how things were going with his research on a chiropractor for me.I could tell as I spoke to him that he was not paying attention to me so I tried to get him to focus.Figuring he was either on another call or working on a quote I told him I would be over and we could talk better then.As I was about to leave my 15 yo daughter called me to talk about a test she was taking and then to my surprise as I was heading to the front door to leave I looked down the hall I could see my husband, laptop in hand, coming in through the French doors which led to my sister’s backyard.With a giant grin on his face we met in the hallway.I was still talking to my daughter at the same time my husband was signaling for me to sit down so he could talk to me.My daughter then told me I was not paying attention to her (exactly what I had accused my husband of, LOL) and when I asked my husband if I could have minute to finish up with her he said no.That being very out of the ordinary, coupled with his giant smile and laptop in hand, I told my daughter I would get back to her as soon as I finished talking to her father.I headed toward the kitchen but he then asked me to sit down in the living room so we could have privacy.As soon as we sat down I began to try to figure out what was up (usual for me!), “You got that big order?” NO.“You are traveling somewhere else?”NO.I think I spit out a few more things until he put his laptop on my lap.As I looked at the screen I saw the cutest face, my heart melted and I knew I was in love.
After declaring how cute the baby was my next thought and declaration was “Sarah called you??!!!”God must have been smiling…GOTCHA!I was completely shocked, surprised and taken off guard!I guess that prayer for my heart to be asleep worked!(Think you PWM!) Of course my honey had a big grin as he told me (Miss Yahoo group blog queen) all about his wonderful conversation with Sarah.It was of course a blessing for us but it was also special for Sarah as it was her first ever referral call.
Totally excited we headed back home (next door) to surprise our 2 older daughters.When we arrived we called the girls and had them come to the living room.Of course my oldest was eaves dropping in the next room but gratefully she had not heard a thing.With a “Guess what?” and smiles that were over the top on our faces they both figured it out, and after seeing his sweet face they gave out the warmest “he’s so cute” that ever blessed this mamas heart!
Next we made a video call to my sister next door, where my youngest daughters were.They loved seeing baby brother’s picture come up on the instant message and of course they all thought he was cute!Next was a video call to my mom, who of course joined in the “He’s so cute” chorus, and then a call and email to my SIL at work.Since at any little news she has always said, “I know!You got your referral!” we really expected her to do the same when we told her to check her emails.She didn’t and we got to give her a big surprise too.The not so big surprise was that she just melted and thought he was perfectly cute.Well with big beautiful eyes, a cute nose and personality that come across even in a picture, what can I say except…he is “all that”…and more!
After all the excitement I finally got to calm down enough to read carefully through Eyob’s paperwork.Of course his medical looked fine, all tests negative that needed to be.The growth and development they noted were that he: Bubbles, Rolls over, Grasps objects and transfers, Follows light in all directions, Sits unsupported momentarily and has NO dentition.
After converting his weight, length and head circumference we realized he was either a giant 7 month old or simply older than they noted.
2/04/2009
Weight9.4 kg/20.7 lbs75-90thpercentile
Length71 cm/27.95 inches75-90th
Head circum.46 cm/18.11 inches90-95th
Weight for length75-90th
Perhaps more like 10-12 months?Avonlea got her first tooth at 11 months so that is possible but looking at the fact that he is only sitting unsupported momentarily still leaves us wondering if is he younger than a year and just big.We shall see! What we know for now is that we feel blessed, Eyob has melted our hearts and we can’t wait to make him a part of our family!
It’s been has been exactly three weeks since I spoke to Sarah asking for information about referrals, since Samuel was leaving for Mexico.(At that time (2/05/09) she had said our agency’s facilitator had told them there were referrals coming but nothing more (no number, no gender, ages, etc.). She said they would probably be given out in the next month or so.)
It is amazing how, up until this week in our adoption process, I have not really thought of any phone call as being “the call”.Over the last couple of days an excitement has grown in my heart each time I have heard the phone ring.Perhaps I feel this way because it had been 3 weeks since my conversation with Sarah, or maybe it is the fact that medicals can take two to three weeks or perhaps it is just having more time on my hands as I am recovering from a bad concussion.What I really hope is that it is God getting my heart ready to “meet” our boys!
Anyway, I have an appointment today with yet another doctor to check on the injuries I incurred when I fell on the ice.I will never forget the date, February 5th 2009.Not because of the fall, however, but because our adoption coordinator brought us hope with the possibility that we might meet our boys sometime soon.
Our placement agency is relatively new to adoptions in Ethiopia and they are still working on getting a consistent system in place (and as my honey pointed out, aren't we blessed our God is bigger than all that!) Not having any US staff in Ethiopia they many times have to deal with communication issues and must learn how to balance the need for things to take place and the Ethiopian cultural boundaries.
That being said as far as the referral process I had understood, from our old coordinator that it was 1,2,3.
1. Heads up on identified children from Abebe, the IAN facilitator in Ethiopia.
2. Pics arrive later (names, genders, number of children)
3. Medicals, background/social history arrive 3 weeks or more afterwards.
Well so much for MY 1, 2 3 list, LOL!!! After asking our new coordinator, who is now the head coordinator for Ethiopian adoptions at our agency, I realized my nice idea was very wrong. Basically there is no cut and dry process for referrals.
1. Sometimes the agency receives all the information (pics, medical, social) all at once without prior notice.
2. Sometimes they hear about possible referrals long before they get them.
3. Sometimes they get a picture and social, and then have to wait on medical reports.
4. Sometimes they just get a picture and have to wait for everything else.
5. Or a combination of every other scenario, LOL! Literally it can be different every time.
So why is that? For instance- if a child is left at the orphanage the agency may get a picture and social the same day they find out about the child BUT if their facilitator has to drive to go get the children they may know some general info about them in advance but not get any referral paperwork for some time...
Though not as black and white as I thought it is wonderful to have this information for the boys as they ask questions in the future.
Well Samuel just called from the doctors office and he has shingles! OUCH! I have had it twice and I now how much it can hurt. Amazingly my eldest daughter has had a horrible cycle which she has never had), my 5yo is out of sorts and my 2 you old teething TERRIBLY! All this while I am feeling so badly from the fall and now have another cold! We know this is an attack as this is all happening in the midst of God blessing us with revelation in our hearts, followed with repentance and a desire to move forward and bear godly fruit. This adoption (as every other time we have added a child to our family) has been a time for God to get our attention, get hold of our hearts a do a deepening work. Oh that we would be found faithful!
A few months ago I felt the prompting of the Lord to invite several women who are with our agency to come together (via email) in prayer. Since then I have been so blessed by our "fellowship", encouragement and focus to pray for one another, our agency, other prospective adoptive families and the children we have adopted of hope to adopt.
Yesterday as we prayed and fasted as a group I felt my prayer request being answered. I asked that the Lord to please put my heart to "sleep" until it was time for us to receive our referrals. Well yesterday evening and today I have God's peace in my heart once again. I do feel a new excitement about getting our referrals, but do not have that sinking feeling and uneasiness that had crept into my heart. Praise God for HIS faithfulness!!!
Things have been pretty easy with waiting this time...until today. I guess my conversation with our coordinator last week has really sunk in. I guess I never really thought our wait would be this long. We have been waiting 4 months for a referral and have at least one with possibly several more months to go. We have gone from a 1-3 month wait, to 3-6 months, to 4-9 months (Our last estimate from our old coordinator.). I KNOW I have no right to complain. There are many others for whom the entire process has been longer. This wait for referral is nothing even compared to our other 2 adoptions which were 9 (we never made it to #1 but adopted our precious daughter as a SN waiting baby) and 11 months and we would still be in the high 200's if we were still with CHSFS. Our first adoption took 14 months total and the second 13. So far we are at 11 months since we officially started our Ethiopia adoption without a referral (NOT counting the 5 months we were on hold with our first agency for Viet Nam) so this will be our longest adoption so far. These feelings have just crept in and I feel bad even thinking this way. I have so much to be grateful for.
Ok, this just hit out of nowhere, crying here, this is an official adoption meltdown. Sorry. I think part of it is that old fear about this adoption even being completed that has crept in. I guess I just want to do it fast and get it over with, over with no miscarriages, so to speak. I know God's timing is perfect, I can see it in the faces of my daughters. I guess I need to just re-set my heart...NO not me do it but rather have the Father put HIS desires and expectations in my heart. Please agree with my prayer. Thanks for "listening" and praying...
Since Samuel was heading out to Mexico today on a business trip, and we did not want him to miss out on any exciting happenings, I decided to call our adoption coordinator. No referral news for us BUT she did say that they had been informed of incoming referrals. There was no other information, no pictures, names, gender, ages or even number of children. These are children that have been identified as adoptable but that are only at the very beginning stages of the process to be considered referrals for US families. This process, I have been told, is actually more involved (in terms of paperwork) than the process we underwent to be able adopt and can take a few weeks or more to complete. The results of some of the medical testing alone can take 3 weeks to be completed. Anyway our coordinator said the referrals "will probably go out in" (she hesitated here) "the next month or so". So good news for us? Our baby boys may be in this group of children or they may not...we shall see as God reveals HIS plan!
Hey maybe for my birthday on March 11th or Samuel's on March 16th!
After emailing with our coordinator and Samuel speaking to another one at the main office last week, we received an email from our coordinator yesterday. Reading it we were very happy she had emailed for clarification. Apparently the conversation between the coordinator and my husband last week left her thinking the opposite of what he felt. She thought Samuel had considered sitting on a referral (waiting over the 10 day period to accept a referral-in hopes of a second) and that he "made it clear that he did not want to accept a referral until we were aware that another child would be referred soon." At first I thought the coordinator speaking to Samuel had clients mixed up but then I realized this was not a conversation many clients would be having with her. Then I remembered how many conversations between 2 people really take place: What you say, what they say, what you think, what they think, what you think they said, what they think you said, etc...not to mention whatever past experiences each participant in the conversation brings to the mix. Hmmm...maybe she was blowing bubbles, or he was snacking on chips or her phone line was hay wire or our girls were screaming in the background (NEVER, not my angels, LOL!) I got it, the cats were barfing as an airplane was flying overhead, the garbage truck was dumping, the UPS guy was honking in the driveway and FEDEX was ringing our doorbell... HA, HA, HA!!! (I needed a laugh!)
In the end just chalk it up to static in the airways? "Nope", as my adorable 2 year old would say. Seriously it was simply a misunderstanding but I think I finally understand the bigger picture. What is the greatest way the enemy can attack us now? To bring fear and confusion in the midst of our journey, to steal our joy and as a result our praises, to keep us down and dim our light so we will never be a testimony and an encouragement for others to adopt and ultimately bring these little ones into His Kingdom. Last week was not just a freak out about reaching #1 and our adoption ending or about losing another sweet baby boy because of a lost referral. It was an opportunity to gather up my armor, receiving help from others put it on, (Your faithful prayers ladies. Thank you!) receive the peace that surpasses all understanding as I praised my Lord, and knowing HIS Mercies are new every morning, head back into the battle. Phil 4: 4 Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say, Rejoice. 5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. 6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. 7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. 9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.
Having dealt with my own fears we are ready to move forward and do whatever needs to be done to bring both our boys home. We have been given 2 options by IAN, receive 2 single referrals as they are available or pass on a single referral and wait until 2 baby boy referrals come in at one time. Though waiting until 2 referrals come in at once may sound easier, if unrelated, the reality is that even in that scenario one boy may pass and the other not on the first try or paperwork issues for one may arise that does not for the other and they end up not passing at the same time anyway. All this to say when asked what we wanted to do we chose to let God be God and not close the doors to any of HIS possibilities!So however He wants to do it is will be a blessing for us...Praise God, for He is the author of this journey and the guardian of my heart!
After emailing with our coordinator and Samuel speaking to another one at the main office last week, we received an email from our coordinator yesterday. Reading it we were very happy she had emailed for clarification. Apparently the conversation between the coordinator and my husband last week left her thinking the opposite of what he felt. She thought Samuel had considered sitting on a referral (waiting over the 10 day period to accept a referral-in hopes of a second) and that he "made it clear that he did not want to accept a referral until we were aware that another child would be referred soon." At first I thought the coordinator speaking to Samuel had clients mixed up but then I realized this was not a conversation many clients would be having with her. Then I remembered how many conversations between 2 people really take place: What you say, what they say, what you think, what they think, what you think they said, what they think you said, etc...not to mention whatever past experiences each participant in the conversation brings to the mix. Hmmm...maybe she was blowing bubbles, or he was snacking on chips or her phone line was hay wire or our girls were screaming in the background (NEVER, not my angels, LOL!) I got it, the cats were barfing as an airplane was flying overhead, the garbage truck was dumping, the UPS guy was honking in the driveway and FEDEX was ringing our doorbell... HA, HA, HA!!! (I needed a laugh!)
In the end just chalk it up to static in the airways? "Nope", as my adorable 2 year old would say. Seriously, it was simply a misunderstanding but I think I finally understand the bigger picture. What is the greatest way the enemy can attack us now? To bring fear and confusion in the midst of our journey, to steal our joy and as a result our praises, to keep us down and dim our light so we will never be a testimony and an encouragement for others to adopt and ultimately bring these little ones into His Kingdom. Last week was not just a freak out about reaching #1 and our adoption ending or about losing another sweet baby boy because of a lost referral. It was an opportunity to gather up my armor, receiving help from others put it on, (Your faithful prayers PWM ladies. Thank you!) ; receive the peace that surpasses all understanding as I praised my Lord, and knowing HIS Mercies are new every morning, head back into the battle.
Phil 4: 4 Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say, Rejoice. 5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. 6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. 7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. 9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.
Having dealt with my own fears we are ready to move forward and do whatever needs to be done to bring both our boys home. We have been given 2 options by IAN, receive 2 single referrals as they are available or pass on a single referral and wait until 2 baby boy referrals come in at one time. Though waiting until 2 referrals come in at once may sound easier, if unrelated, the reality is that even in that scenario one boy may pass and the other not on the first try or paperwork issues for one may arise that does not for the other and they end up not passing at the same time anyway. All this to say when asked what we wanted to do we chose to let God be God and not close the doors to any of HIS possibilities! So however He wants to do it is will be a blessing for us...Praise God, for He is the author of this journey and the guardian of my heart!
We have just learned that due to changes in court processing procedures, as well as the timing of the process in Ethiopia, it has become very difficult to adopt 2 unrelated children. Due to this our agency has actually decided to stop allowing the adoption of unrelated children in the future. Our case has been "grandfathered in", a blessing as our hearts are ready to bring 2 sons home, but the issues that may arise have been presented to us.
Here is the situation: We could be referred twins (rare!) or 2 unrelated baby boys. If unrelated we were told we might get both referrals at one time (WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!!), or separate. If separate and there is a gap of time between referrals and the paperwork for the second child is not perfect and he does not pass court the first time (normal in ET) then we could be looking at a 3-5 month gap between the approval of the first and second child's case. The problem? The first child having to wait in the orphanage for so long while waiting for the second child's approval. So the first child would be legally yours but you could not travel to get them as we only have one approval from USCIS for VISAS (one approval for 2 children).
Anyway we have been told our only option is waiting. If the length of time does get extensive we will have to pay the additional orphanage costs for the baby, though that is by far no an issue. The issue is of course the health of the baby, and with so many children dieing in ET due to illness, that is a very real issue. Oh and of course the other issue would be our aching arms at home. All flesh aside, this is ALL about these boys. God wants them to have a family and we will do all we can to bring them home. Some families have recently not taken a second referral, not wanting to make the first child wait...that is the very hard part as we feel so called to adopt these 2 boys that are already in our hearts!
Please agree with us in prayer for: The boys God has called to be our sons to be referred together or be twins. That our referrals and court date come quickly to avoid the 3 month closing of the court system. for the rainy season. (June/July-October) Paperwork be COMPLETELY in order for the boys as well as for us BEFORE our court date. Court date be assigned quickly after request and date be soon (before rainy season). That we get the judge who will pass our cases. That there be no cancellation of our court date due to power outages (common). That we pass court the first time.
Also please pray for my heart. This has been my easiest adoption wait but after hearing this over the last couple of days (our original adoption specialist had painted a different picture) I have had a heaviness on my heart I do not believe is from the Lord. After losing 3 baby boys (miscarriages) I resigned myself to the fact that we were just not meant to be boy parents (crazy, I know!). Anyway it was God who gave me the courage to move forward with this adoption and HE alone who put these TWO baby boys on my heart. With all the questions at hand, however, today I felt like I was not even looking forward to a call from the agency if it was for one referral only. Horrible, I know, but it was the fear that the wait for a second referral would be too long and we would have to give up on that child...
I know my trust must continue to be in God, who lead us on this journey. HE has been our direction, grace and strength and by faith we trust He will complete what He began!!!
We have today that due to changes in court processing procedures, as well as the timing of the process in Ethiopia, it has become very difficult to adopt 2 unrelated children. Due to this our agency has actually decided to stop allowing the adoption of unrelated children. Our case has been "grandfathered in", a blessing as our hearts are ready to bring 2 sons home, but the issues that may arise have been presented to us.
Here is the situation:
We could be referred twins (rare!) or 2 unrelated baby boys. If unrelated we were told we might get both referrals at one time (WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!!), or separate. If separate and there is a gap of time between referrals and the paperwork for the second child is not perfect and he does not pass court the first time (normal in ET) then we could be looking at a 3-5 month gap between the approval of the first and second child's case. The problem? The first child having to wait in the orphanage for so long while waiting for the second child's approval. So the first child would be legally yours but you could not travel to get them as we only have one approval from USCIS for VISAS (one approval for 2 children).
Anyway we have been told our only option is waiting. If the length of time does get extensive we will have to pay the additional orphanage costs for the baby, though that is by far no an issue. The issue is of course the health of the baby, and with many children dying in ET due to illness, that is a very real issue. Oh and of course the other issue would be our aching arms at home. All flesh aside; this is ALL about these boys. God wants them to have a family and we will do all we can to bring them home. Some families have recently not taken a second referral; not wanting to make the first child wait...that is the very hard part as we feel so called to adopt these 2 boys that are already in our hearts!
So please pray for:
The boys God has called to be our sons to be referred together or be twins.
That our referrals and court date come quickly to avoid the 3 month closing of the court system for the rainy season. (June/July-October) Paperwork be COMPLETELY in order for the boys as well as for us BEFORE our court date.
Court date be assigned quickly after request and date be as soon as possible.
That we get the judge who will pass our cases.
That there be no cancellation of our court date due to power outages (common).
That we pass court the first time.
Our trust continues to be in God, who led us on this journey. HE has been our direction, grace and strength and by faith we trust He will complete what He began!!!
